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audrey farnsworth

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Eels Vs. Snakes

[imagine this first part as a scroll, like at the beginning of star wars] snakes and eels have been at…

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Posted in: Uncategorized

isolating with the skeleton manning the ship inside of my brain, episode 4: shipwrecked

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Posted in: self care

isolating with the skeleton manning the ship inside of my brain, episode 3: feelings!

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Posted in: full scripts

isolating with the skeleton manning the ship inside of my brain (episode two)

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Posted in: full scripts

limited series: social isolating with the skeleton who mans the ship inside of my brain (episode one)

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Posted in: Uncategorized

leaked script of lifetime miniseries about gritty punching that kid

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Posted in: full scripts

the annual holiday letter, from detective audrey p. farnsworth

greetings friends and family, it’s that time again—time for my annual holiday letter. i’ll get right into it. this was…

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Posted in: holiday

Captain’s Log of the Beluga Russian Spy (Part II)

an emotional rollercoaster of an update from hvaldimir, the russian spy beluga whale.

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Posted in: beluga

i fell off one of the boats on the pirates of the caribbean ride 17 consecutive times

i didn’t trust a soul on this planet but everything changed one day when i decided to go to disneyland by myself.…

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Posted in: fight

i’m releasing my 4th of july plans to the public.

the loud holiday is finally upon us and i couldn’t be happier.

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Posted in: holiday

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